Awakened to Michael closing the window downstairs. It's an obnoxious ordeal - part of the compromise we make living in a 50-year-old building. But it is just another example of how our lives are intertwined by closeness, proximity, cycles, etc. Many days hearing him come and go might be the only contact with humans that I have. Fuck that. Gotta get up and out. Tried to go back to sleep. I used to live in a story book world which is now a shambles, so unconscious is where I want to be. But I could not. The Susan's Gourmet food came and looks INCREDIBLE. I am a snot-monster, with a river going down my sinuses, into my throat and lungs, and making all kinds of havoc. So, I've got to get in the shower, wash out my snotty nose with warm salt water, take snotty nose pills, spray snotty nose sprays. Yum. Maybe I can go get a haircut and still make it in time for the free sex therapist and get some sunshine, too.
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Last night I thought of a way that anyone can experience the physical limitations that I face - without the pain part, or the uneven pelvis tilt part. Go find a friend at the E.R. and have them put on a plaster cast from your hips to just under your arms. Then you'll automatically be in my world of limitation and restraint. Not that I would wish that on anyone.
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So - time to clean up and get dressed, call the hair lady, load up on oxycontin and an assortment of other drugs so that I can function without screaming, and go find an adventure. Sounds fun, huh? LOL! At least I don't want to die just now, thanks. That's a major improvement from yesterday. And all it took was good weed! Son of a bitch. No wonder the powers that be want to criminalize the stuff.
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Feel optimistic that this will not be an ordinary day.
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